My daughter asks if we are free Valentine's weekend to stay with the grandchildren.
I check my calendar; I check with Tony; I text her back.
We're good.
She responds, Sweet! You're okay with sacrificing Valentine's evening?
Her question causes me to ponder. I am okay with missing the official Valentine's celebration with my husband. Should I be? Maybe this isn't a good thing to easily give up.
I don't respond right away. I give it a night to think about.
Years ago, we went out for the requisite Valentine's dinner. Having been spontaneous, we didn't make a reservation. Here we were on such an important night hopping for restaurant to restaurant getting rejected for lack of plans.
No fun. We decided forever after to not celebrate on the fourteenth. As time drifted by, I think we celebrated less and less. Tony usually came through with a note and some chocolate, and I think I have a pretty good record of making sugar cookies--heart shaped and pink frosted-for him. Tony may remember differently.
The next day I respond to my daughter, We can enjoy it (Valentine's) through your eyes.
And the future holiday takes on a different meaning. Nothing could make me happier than seeing my children in happy relationships. It's what true love is--seeing beyond your own needs or infatuation, and wishing the best for others. It doesn't diminish my own relationship, it enhances it. For it bears the truth of comfort,
and comfort
is a great place to be
in one's relationships with self and with others.
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