"We were lying on our backs, our heads in the surf break. The waves, the cold water pounded our heads and rushed around our bodies. Our arms were interlocked and we held tightly to one another. Jokingly, I threatened to go internal. To go internal is the worst thing a marine can do."
The marine at the pulpit is sharing his naval experiences. This is one of the most horrendous drills I have ever heard about and never seen. Many times I have been walking the beach and watched the new navy recruits, the experienced marines, the navy seals, train under conditions that would break the average citizen.
They run in boots with heavy packs on their backs. During heavy surf they paddle rubber dingies. I've watched them flip and fly through the waves. On one occasion, I stopped and asked a cussing sergeant if they didn't train the marines how to paddle in the surf. "Ma'am, some of these boys have never even seen the ocean. They learn."
Tough love.
I had never before heard the phrase don't go internal. The command is to keep oneself, when enduring pain and suffering, from going inward to cope with the discomfort. Going internal shuts off the sufferer from others. It keeps him from being aware of his surroundings. From being available to his comrades. It's a natural instinct to go within oneself when suffering, but it keeps us from helping others. The welfare of others is traded for the welfare of self. Going internal is thinking of ourselves and forgetting the needs of others. It's devastating to a navy mission.
It's devastating to a life's mission.
It's a shift from, "What can I do to help?" to "Poor me."
I discovered this on my own while still a young woman. I was in my second year of college when one day I felt a little blue. I cannot remember the cause. But I had a church calling to care for several of my neighbors in a college apartment complex. Wanting to shirk the blues, I refocused my energy to visiting these young women. I just forged ahead, and I found immediate relief in my concern for others. It was such a dramatic experience that it became a part of my soul.
My first year of marriage, my job required me to start work the day after Christmas. It was my first time not being home for Christmas. Tony and I baked and delivered Christmas plates to other students who were also stuck at college.
We stayed external. Christmas had meaning away from home in the home we were creating.
The navy advocates service as a guiding principle. They're in good company. With Jesus, who said and exemplified, "Love one another."
"When the going gets tough, don't go internal. Focus your energy on becoming an asset to your community and you will find your way." Afghanistan veteran and military writer Michael Abrams,
Don't go internal.
Comments