The antidote to exhaustion is wholeheartedness.
David Whyte who heard this from a monk (probably)
At first the quote seems to be counter intuitive. The relief from exhaustion (one might think), is to crawl into bed and curl into the fetal position. To withdraw. To do less or do just enough to get by. Then to quietly whisper in defeat, "Finit."
But after re-reading the quote and allowing it to simmer, I see how wise of an insight it is.
For it is the lack of wholeheartedness that causes exhaustion.
It takes a lot of physical energy to drag one's feet.
I spent many months putting off my master's thesis because of all the good reasons to do so: covid, family separation; my thesis books were in a different country...it was exhausting. Finally (and that was more recent than I care to admit), when I turned the channel from procrastination to wholeheartedness, it is only now that I've had the energy to study, annotate and write. I've even written deadlines in my planner. I'm on top of the world instead of carrying it on my back.
Wholeheartedness cured my exhaustion
The nation's recent woes are exhausting. The exhaustion stems from a lack of wholeheartedness. If we but wholeheartedly looked at both perspectives and started listening to each other. Instead of demeaning one group for how they feel or mocking the evidence as to how they're treated, if we but WHOLEHEARTEDLY listened and then acted upon the natural empathy that emerges from listening.
Child rearing is exhausting until we sit down and play with those children. Put away our distractions and wholeheartedly focus on the one. And then the other...Tony is adored by all his grandchildren and these feelings have grown from his wholeheartedness approach. When they walk through the door, or when he walks through their door, he sits down or plays chase, lifts one onto his shoulders. He engages solely with the little people. He may be exhausted at the end of the day but the exhaustion is born from giving it all--and then it is a satisfying exhaustion.
We are all burdened by tasks from which we cannot escape. Instead of begrudging the dishes, just do them and sing while you do. Do it wholeheartedly taking pride in scouring off the cookie sheet burn, washing the oft-neglected handle of the pan, cleaning the corners of the sink.
Trying to be all things to all people is exhausting. Put aside who we think we're supposed to be. Embrace who we are and wholeheartedly develop that one precious aspect every single day. Wholeheartedly embrace authenticity.
I spent many years finishing the school day in exhaustion and I believe it was more from trying to be the teacher I thought I should be. After twelve years of teaching, after adding to my skills, after honing experiences and always striving to improve~~when I come home from school now, I am energized; wholeheartedness is life giving.
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